Friday, May 29, 2009

If that ain't a load of ...

Disappointed today. My homemade reality show pitch, along with demo footage, was horrifically shot down today. Mind you, this was my first attempt at sharing with the world, my video buffet of reality goodness, but a rejection still hurts.

Now, granted, my "series" was a bit avant garde and risque, but at the same time charming and downright lovable. I called it , "From the Throne - A daily peek at the toilet habits of the American male." I was going to cover EVERYTHING, the camera would catch all the nuances, faces and sounds, (of course, not bodily sounds, but rather grunts and any reading or praying. I wasn't aiming for sophomoric fart jokes. Sickos.) Lotsa important decisions are made in the bathroom, and I was going to capture and chronicle it all. Cameras in famous celebrities restrooms. From Freddie Prinze Jr. to Abe Vigoda. Dane Cook to Vern Troyer, I was going to take this global.

I even envisioned having re-enactments of historical figures like Abraham Lincoln or Napoleon, filmed in sepia tone, squatting and reliving those monumental dumps. Or the post forbidden apple dump session in the Garden of Eden. It was genius.

But alas, it was not meant to be. The powers that be shot me down with words of forged steel and tempered resolve. They issued me an informal rejection wrapped in a manila colored envelope sealed with a death stained kiss.

Well not really, the death kiss is just my way of embellishing the moment. Anyways ... they said no, and for me to seek help, or something of the sort. But get this, in the letter they refer to my idea as a piece of crap.



Side note:

The Vern Troyer episode, had "From The Throne", been taken to fruition, it would have been called ... "Little Sh*t and Flush tones".

Pure Genius.